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 2600 miles later our adventure came to an end and I returned home. New memories were made and old memories relived. Rachel is here for just a few more days before she flies home. I know her momma is ready to have her home, but we will miss her. She’s been a joy to have. 

I was hoping returning home would be easier than it was. I’ve cried twice since returning home and that was within the first 4 hours of being home. 

It’s hard to articulate what it feels like being here without Mark. It’s amazing what a difference the absence of one person makes. I still feel like I’m drifting without an anchor and fighting to stay afloat. 

I so wish I could just have another hour with him. To say everything that have wished I said the last week he was here. Things that I thought I’d have plenty of time to say. I wish I could ask him how I’m supposed to go on without him.  I know his advice on how to move forward would be 100% what I need to do and hear. I need to hear him tell me, “You’ll always be my girl,” one more time. I wish I knew how little time I was going to have with him on Easter Sunday when he started not feeling well. I don’t know that I can do this.  

Comments

  1. LyndaJuly 22, 2022 at 9:13 PM

    You writing is beautiful and expressive. I identify more than you know. When Ron died I felt like the person I needed to deal with such a horrible loss was Ron and he was the one that I lost.

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